When I reached the point you describe, I turned to temping. I registered with three agencies and worked for a series of high level muckety mucks as an admin asst. No stress, and no entanglements of any kind. Fifteen years. It worked for me. I had quit a job (after 12 years) where I’d begun to feel very much unappreciated. While new technology was taking over some of my more tedious duties, my direct supervisor refused to consider cutting my hours! “Looking busy” (her suggestion) was not in my job description nor in my wheelhouse!
Not when the Dean of the University is a frequent visitor! I could not so much as read a paperback—so I took in work from other department admins rather than pretend to work! I begged to be able to leave (unpaid) when I clearly was not needed!
I find myself in a position where nobody really pays me much mind. Where I can turn off my laptop at 5 and never work weekends or holidays. Where I can take a vacation and not take my laptop. I've never really experienced anything like this. I like it... but it feels alien and I have to constantly remind myself that this is FINE.
I do wonder what happens when I wake up one day and it's not FINE ... as a 60 year-old, not male. I mean I earned a fine living with part-time/temp stuff during the pandemic... could I do that again? I don't know. I don't really want to find out. The insurance is really good where I'm at now...
I'm so very glad to hear you are currently in a good place and in a good job. Stability is precious and must be treasured -- especially as we not-male people continue to dare to grow older. I hope you don't have to find out. You're a fucking treasure, for sure, wherever you work, so I hope they're not fools and can see that.
I'm exhausted by vulnerability and one of the few ways I know to endure it is to remind myself there are many others like me, who feel we have walked through the world fully peeled and exposed, always. So thank you for your company, now, and through the years. <3
When I reached the point you describe, I turned to temping. I registered with three agencies and worked for a series of high level muckety mucks as an admin asst. No stress, and no entanglements of any kind. Fifteen years. It worked for me. I had quit a job (after 12 years) where I’d begun to feel very much unappreciated. While new technology was taking over some of my more tedious duties, my direct supervisor refused to consider cutting my hours! “Looking busy” (her suggestion) was not in my job description nor in my wheelhouse!
I'd love to have a job where "looking busy" was my only requirement. I can be very busy on all my own projects!
Not when the Dean of the University is a frequent visitor! I could not so much as read a paperback—so I took in work from other department admins rather than pretend to work! I begged to be able to leave (unpaid) when I clearly was not needed!
Did I mention that temping allowed me to take vacation time whenever I chose? Also paid for health insurance, through one agency.
I find myself in a position where nobody really pays me much mind. Where I can turn off my laptop at 5 and never work weekends or holidays. Where I can take a vacation and not take my laptop. I've never really experienced anything like this. I like it... but it feels alien and I have to constantly remind myself that this is FINE.
I do wonder what happens when I wake up one day and it's not FINE ... as a 60 year-old, not male. I mean I earned a fine living with part-time/temp stuff during the pandemic... could I do that again? I don't know. I don't really want to find out. The insurance is really good where I'm at now...
I'm so very glad to hear you are currently in a good place and in a good job. Stability is precious and must be treasured -- especially as we not-male people continue to dare to grow older. I hope you don't have to find out. You're a fucking treasure, for sure, wherever you work, so I hope they're not fools and can see that.
I understand so much of this. As usual, your writing touches on truths that many of us sense but cannot articulate. Thank you for this.
I'm exhausted by vulnerability and one of the few ways I know to endure it is to remind myself there are many others like me, who feel we have walked through the world fully peeled and exposed, always. So thank you for your company, now, and through the years. <3